On sexism

I almost posted the following to an internet forum, but then decided I didn't want the headache of dealing with the asshats who would almost certainly come out of the woodwork to argue with me. But I think it's a decent piece, so I'll post it here.

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There's piggish, boorish, nasty behavior, intended to offend.

There's overt sexism, like I saw on bikeforums.com, a thread entitled "Why are women so stupid?" Do you think a thread called "Why are black people so stupid?" would have stayed up for any length of time?

Then there's inadvertent sexism, such as when guys use the word "girl" as an insult. This is offensive. Again, imagine if they used a racial epithet to insult one another.

And there's unconscious sexism, like the assumption many men have that it's their world and they get to give us permission to do things. Or that being male is a "normal" state of things and that being female is some sort of unnatural aberration. Or that stereotypical feminine traits are inferior to stereotypically masculine traits. Or that male athleticism is inherently superior to female athleticism.

There are also lots of sexist [I]women[/I]! Some have internalized the sexism they've been exposed to, and feel women are inferior and ought to be subservient to men. Others revile anything typically feminine, because they're trying to be like men. I'm guilty of the latter myself: I wouldn't buy a pink bike because I thought it was "too girly". But then I saw a woman on the trail with a pink bike, a pink jersey, and a pink helmet. Even her hair was pink. She was working that pink. She owned it.

I kinda wish I had a pink bike now. But I digress.

The boors and the overt sexists I simply avoid. They are beyond help, in my opinion. "[expletive deleted] off!" is about the only thing worth saying to them.

It is sometimes worth gently educating the inadvertent sexists. Stuff like: "When you use the word 'girl' as an insult, it bothers me. It sounds like you think girls are worthless and weak." Some people "get it" at that point. Or they reveal themselves to be overt sexists, at which point they are not worth my time.

It's very difficult to get people to understand the impact of unconscious sexism. But in many ways, I think it's one of the most insidious and damaging forms. It quietly shapes attitudes and identities.

It's difficult to talk about sexism in a blame-neutral setting, without making men go on the defensive. It's difficult to talk about sexism without being accused of being "oversensitive." A female poster on this thread talked about not getting her "panties in a twist" over various forms of sexism. I think it is possible to identify and analyze sexism rationally, without getting emotional - and we all know that "getting emotional" is silly because it's feminine. See what I mean?

I think it's good for men and women to be able to recognize all forms of sexism, because in recognizing sexism, they can more effectively reject sexism.